Trace Adkins — Honkey Tonk Badonkadonk
A couple of weeks ago I was chilling with the homie (and non-blogging-ass “contributor”) Stretch at this all-Asian bar in the Excelsior, when all of a sudden this shit comes on the jukebox. Now whoever had gotten their hands on the machine had already subjected us to a string of awful nu-country songs (dude must’ve thrown in like five bucks), so it took a moment for this one to really differentiate itself from the rest. But once that chorus came in, we both did a double-take. Instantly my mind went from wondering which asshole had fed the jukebox (and, incidentally, since when Asians liked country) to whether I had just heard what I thought I’d heard. Did he…could he have possibly just said “badonkadonk?”
Sadly, he had. And apparently he wasn’t just content to sing about it. Today I finally searched “honky tonk badonkadonk” on Youtube, and to my surprise this shit came up, spelled just as I had imagined. Apparently it dropped in 2005, and must’ve been a huge hit, judging by the myriad favorable comments (sample: “this music video should be outlawd for tdmsw (to damn many sexy women)”) The strangest thing about this video is that, despite its complete absence of black people (or any other minority, for that matter) the whole thing is basically a carbon copy of the average, stereotypical rap video: Skimpily clad women, bling (check out Adkins’s iced-out brass knuckles), bottle service, a club that bears no resemblance to any “honkytonk” anywhere. There’s even the obligatory “artist standing in front, girls dancing in unison behind him” shots, with Adkins smoking a cigar and hand-gesturing instead of playing his guitar. I mean, he might as well be rapping. Which is weird, because I can’t imagine anyone who seriously listens to this liking rap. I guess, like the song’s appropriation of yesterday’s hottest slang, it’s just another example of hip-hop taking over American culture, even the seemingly immune genre of country music.
Anyway, social analysis aside, this video is pretty hilarious. If you can’t sit through the whole thing, I suggest fast-forwarding to about 3:32. Priceless.